Feeling the Music Again

I've been wanting to pen this down before I even had the idea of creating this blog. 🤭

But I don't know how important is it to write this down? Do I really need to?

I could carry a certain feeling or concept and go about my life, without needing to pen it down to...... to what?

Yet, every time I sing nowadays, I would come back to feeling this. As if I need to share this or something.

I LOVE to sing. I've always wanted to become a singer.

It has been a journey full of ups and downs, which is probably not surprising lol.

Despite how difficult the journey has been, I've always held this love in my heart.

I sing, I simply want to sing. I sing a lot more often when I was younger. I don't sing as much in recent years, and there are times where I forget to sing.

There are times where I feel down and something in my heart urges me to sing. Even then, I could be reluctant sometimes. But when I really do sing, I always have fun.

So what has this got to do with the theme of this blog - My love for Shibby; The Shibby Tofu? ⬜️😛

My mind is kinda jumping from one place to another as I wonder how long should this post be. XD I shouldn't be here to talk about my passion for singing, or how things affect one another which has caused this to be a difficult and at times, painful, journey for me.

But believe it or not, things have been so different and amazing ever since I got into Shibby!

(This sounds so gimmicky, as if I'm trying to promote an MLM product called "Shibby". 😂) 

Note: MLM = Multi-Level Marketing here, not Man Loving Man

On a serious note, there's something magical here, specifically in this singing/music thing I'm talking about. My interaction with Shibby's files has somehow or other, helped me develop a happier and more harmonious relationship with singing and music.

But yes, it could also just be a timing thing; the stars aligned, and I got myself into Shibby's art at the same time. Regardless, her art still impacts me positively today, in my singing and stuff.

The First Magical Moment

The first magical moment happened in October 2025.

One day, I decided I wanted to just sit in the living room and watch some music videos on the TV. I just wanted to engage with music.

In the past, I often played and watched concerts and music videos on the TV, especially when I had to finish a painting or an art work. I'd be singing along, using my paintbrush as a mic whenever the feeling hit. Why watch music videos and not just listen to music? Because some music videos are aesthetically pleasing and I love watching choreography in music videos.

It had been a looooooooooooong time since I last watched a collection of music videos on the TV. More than 5 years at least, I'm sure. 

That day, I sat there and casted YouTube to my TV. I played whatever that came to mind. I forced myself to focus only on watching music videos and nothing else. 

After 1-2 songs, I suddenly felt a huge wave of something. I don't know what that was, but I felt myself "feeling" the music super strongly. That feeling was so strong that I had goosebumps all over me. I had the "tingles". I was quite blown away by what I felt and wondered what that was. At the same time, I was blown away by the music, because I was feeling it so strongly, as if the music was flowing inside me. It was reminiscent of how music made me feel as a kid, back when I had a burning passion for music. 

I don't remember if I had listened to a Shibby file before situating myself in front of the TV that day. However, I was certainly listening to her files A LOT during that period of time as I was actively exploring her art.

I had never had this full-blown tingles situation before. It just reminded me of how music moved me deeply as a kid. Sure, some songs are able to move me and cause me to feel tingles at times, but I never had this huge wave of tingles/pleasurable feeling or whatever that was. 

The wave was so huge that it shocked me. It's also why I remember that moment very vividly. I still don't know what that was. It happened at a song of a favorite singer who is also my favorite human in the world, so it made me extra happy. 

I was just so happy that I could feel the music again! It felt right, it felt like something finally fell into place and made sense. It made me realize how numb I had been to music - something I hadn't realized before. 

I hadn't done anything different or special and nothing drastic happened in my life then. The only "change" I made was listening to Shibby's files. Like I said, I was listening to her files a lot, and so, that could also just be the happy chemicals at play.

But ever since then, I would get these goosebumps/tingles whenever I immersed myself into music or singing, whether or not I listened to her file. I truly think that moment unlocked something.

These tingles feel similar to the pleasure I get when listening to Shibby's files. It's a sense of pleasure (happiness), and feeling it fully. It's nothing physical or sexual.

A few days ago, I wanted to practice some singing after not singing and listening to much music for 2 weeks. (That's not a very good thing for a supposedly huge music lover like me...... That's the state I'm often in now but I'm at peace with this.)

I decided to sing after casually remembering it's been a while since I did that.

I started with a song that felt difficult to me. At one point in the song, I felt a nice wave of tingles over me as I felt the music strongly.

I DID listen to a Shibby file that day before I started singing. I don't remember if I started singing directly after though.

As I flowed with the music, I got more relaxed gradually and I surprisingly hit all the high notes easily. I knew how to sing without knowing exactly how to hit the notes, if that makes sense. But I was just feeling the music in my body and letting the interpretation occur on its own. 

Every time the music touches me, I feel a wave of tingles. This has been happening pretty often ever since that first magical moment in October. 

Regarding Relaxation...

This wave of tingly sensation has been so amazing and also a little creepy? Haha! It's not creepy. I can't help but think there's some connection to it. 

While it's not necessarily a Shibby thing, it could be the relaxation I've been able to receive from Shibby's work that has led to these sensations. She has helped me loosen up so much in my body, and I could now "feel" the things again. 

I mean, at the very least, my interaction with her art has deepened my insight on surrendering and letting go, which are the very same concepts often emphasized in my spiritual learnings. Let go and flow, and I've actually gained a lot more by doing so.

With the regular "training" and relaxation from Shibby, I get better at letting go and just enjoying the ride in other areas of my life.

I treated my singing sessions very seriously in the past. I always wanted to be better at singing. I was always pushing myself. I always wanted to hit the higher notes to prove that I'm good enough to become a singer. I only realized how uptight I had been after experiencing this wave of tingles! 

I always had this thought: 

• Low voice = you cannot be a singer. 
• Hit high notes = you can be a singer. 

My mom's remark had affected me deeply as a kid. She said that a "girl" should sing like a "girl"; sing in high keys. But I'm not a so-called "girl", anyway! I've always sung in low keys and pitches, like a guy basically (by her standard). It's fine, since that's what I like doing anyway; singing in low keys. Her remark had made me feel inadequate for decades.

Also, regardless of gender, singers with higher vocal ranges do tend to receive more recognition. So I doubted myself, thinking that I will never be enough, especially because I was quite adamant against singing in a "female voice" (aka high keys).

As such, I'd always felt inadequate about becoming a singer. Even when I did finally start singing high notes and was able to sustain them decently many years later, I still felt inadequate. 

As of now, my passion isn't like before. I take it easy, so I don't really think about it much. However, it's nice to be able to sing better (I think) after my immersion into Shibby's work!

I'd say, I sing better now because I'm more relaxed about it. It's surprising how things work this way.

With Shibby especially, it's wonderful and rather magical. Like, why would my interaction with erotic hypnosis help me with this? 😂 Especially for someone like me who isn't very interested in the sexual realm of things.

But I'm just a very curious person - thank goodness for that.

Perhaps, due to my regular engagement with Shibby's art, I've been able to let go of myself in life like how I would with her files. I'm letting go and letting music take the lead. 

Or rather, I'm letting my heart take the lead. 

I'm letting go of my control over how the music or singing should feel, and only focusing on what it's making me feel.

I sing so much better when I go with the flow, letting the music and lyrics touch my heart naturally. 

What I'm Truly Thankful For

When it comes to sex, or more specifically erotic hypnosis, it's a very intimate and even vulnerable interaction. It requires a lot of trust to let go of control and let someone take the lead.

Knowing how I am, I very well know that I wouldn't have been able to receive these magical benefits if not for Shibby's genuine and kind heart. She's just such a wonderful person! From her work, you can tell she cares about doing things ethically.

That's what I truly want to convey here - I feel very fortunate to have found Shibby. It's just... ah, I don't know how to best put it. It's just been such an amazing journey because none of this would have happened if either one of us wasn't "aligned", for lack of better word.

Certainly, I'm only talking about my side of the story. But a person being a good person is very important to me, e.g. a person who doesn't knowingly harm others.

I don't think it's something easily found in this area of things. To put it vaguely, I feel there's more darkness than light in this area. Life is hard and some people crave for it too much, become addicted, become greedy etc. It’s also why there are so many problems related to this in the world, as well as so much negative stigma attached to it. It's sad either way.

I'm especially grateful to be able to explore because I found someone safe, and then be able to discover all the fun that comes with it.

I've been able to learn so much and gain many unexpected things as well; things that aren't even remotely related to erotic content/sex. What I wrote in this post is just one part of it all. Shibby's such a gem!!